movement

Flo is here still, she's leaving tomorrow morning, I'm leaving tomorrow afternoon. I'm headed up to Ithaca's place for the weekend, then I head back here to catch a plane to Cali for a week. After that week, I'll be back here again and either Ithaca will drive me up to MTL or I'll take a train.
I have a shit ton of zines from printing them at work (fo free!!!) so I'm excited to read them all and show them to peeps. The squat garden got shut down, showed up the other day to find the composter taken apart and half the lot completely cleared, I'd stick around and keep using it and fight for it and all that, but I'm not around here long enough for that, since I'm you know, leaving tomorrow...
All my stuff is packed, I'm not sure what to expect at Ithaca's, I feel that distance and both of us leading busy yet relatively uneventful lives has somewhat deteriorated communications, though we're making an effort, I'd like to think being around each other physically will make things super awesome again.
The free store is blowing up a lot, news stations from other countries wanna do things with it. It's too bad that I met T and got into a bunch of cool anarchist projects only to leave so soon, I'll definitely pick it again when I'm here for the winter. Solidarity.
Oh, also I made a cool bracelet out of an old brown shoelace I had lying around.

Visitors, guests and garbage

V left, he ran his race and came in 3rd in his wave of 250 people, good stuff I think.
Now Flo is here, she called me on my cell while I was at work and asked if she could stay here a bit and told her yea. Nothing too exciting as of yet, went to grub on sunday with V, dumpstered tonight with Flo. and I'll visit Ithaca this weekend which I'm kinda excited for. Montreal soon, which is also exciting, Cali even sooner but I don't really care about Cali that much, dunno why...
Also the squat garden is gonna die methinks, the composter was taken apart, a lot of the weedy areas were cleared and the pallets from the composter were tossed into the garden part of the lot.

running around and dumpstering by accident

Today is pretty fun so far, and we haven't even gone to the party in Greenpoint yet.
On governor's island there was CTF, but not just regular ol' CTF, like zombies vs Commandos CTF. Yea I went and it was fun, if you don't know V is staying here for the weekend to run a race in Brooklyn on Sunday. It was good times, ran around, met cool people and all that.
Came back home, worked on the garden and while removing trash from the lot, found a whole box of unopened and still wrapped reusable shopping bags! Pretty awesome if you ask me, I'm gonna give them out and drop some off at the free store and alla that.
Now though: food and then party and then sleep and then watch V race.

talkin trash

Today was pretty alright I must say. I found out a friend wants to open a squat in NYC, probably Brooklyn, so I'll help him with that if I'm around. I went and watered, pulled weeds, added compost in the garden. Read books at home, ate dumpstered stuff.
At 1PM I was at Bluestockings getting interviewed. Interviewed? about what you ask? Initially just dumpstering, but of course it led to discussion about politics (read: anarchism), economics (read: anti-capitalism/gift economies) subculture (read: subculture) and generally just interesting stuff. When it's all done (it's for a book) I'll get a transcript, and I'll probably try to get my hands on the book it's in as well when it's out. I probably have some time before then. Until then though, I'll just uh, work at the Brooklyn free store, enjoy summer BBQs and do Food not Bombs!
Also yesterday went to see a Books through Bars movie screening/benefit. Brought a bunch of food along; some trash some taken from work, was okay. The fun part was dumpstering on the way home, check the picture.

Trash, food and foreigners

Weekend was pretty super awesome as was tonight.
Sunday, woke up around 11ish and read a bit, Bigs was asleep on a mattress we set out for him. After getting up and eating a tiny breakfast we biked over to ABC no Rio for Food not Bombs. We got there a bit late, but hadn't missed out on much, apparently no one brought food so nothing got cooked. However there were cupcake tops so we each had one and then gave out the rest at Tompkins Square Park. There was a show there but the people in the band that was about to play were fuckers, they were badmouthing homeless people and crust punks and generally being lame and obnoxious, needless to say we quickly left. There was a couple (Change and Burn) from Toronto, we talked about the G20 and punk houses and it turns out they know Green Boots, it also turns out I should check out Death Church in Montreal because it's supposed to be awesome. We parted but only after finding out we'd meet each other at Grub later anyway.
Me and Bigs went to Bluestockings because I wanted to put up a flyer about the squat garden (I'd put one up at ABC no Rio as well). We ended up just chilling there for a bit reading. Went home and napped and felt hungry (cup cake tops just aren't gonna you know, cut it).
post nap: left on the bike, stop at chain pharmacy, buy shoelaces, left hand snack food and chapstick :) Arrive at Grub after only minor confusion. Grub is awesome as usual, meet people, eat food, keep talking to Change and Burn (they're down to host me if I'm ever in Toronto), agree to buy them a band shirt and deliver it somehow when I'm in Montreal. One person I talked to I'm gonna see this Saturday, she wants to interview me about dumpstering and freeganism though I don't like the term.
Today I went to work (bleh), my mom got me a digital camera (expect to start seeing pictures on this blog more often now). We stopped in the Lower East Side to try to find a newspaper, according to Burn I'm in a picture at the Star Fucking Hipster show, but we failed at finding it. It's cool though I saw NinjaSonik hanging out in the street! Got home, read a bit, went and dumpstered at Trader Joe's, returned home with ridiculous amounts of food. Ride Bikes, Eat Trash!
(I should finish making/writing my zine)

Since, Bigs and bad parties

Friday: Went to work, worked, lunch break (left handed a meal), worked more, got off work, biked to Bluestockikngs and worked on my zine, it's not done yet but almost. It's gonna be called "Ride Bikes Eat Trash" and will be about whatever I feel at the moment I'm writing it. After writing (and reading) a bit I looked at the time and decided to head north again. You see my plan was to meet Since (yes I was finally able to get into contact with her) after her work and then hang out and do something. Biked up, met her and we decided to go to a free concert in Brooklyn. Taking the train with my bike always makes me feel strange. The concert was good times, the music was awesome rock with a really intense lead singer/guitar and there was an great great violin. The one thing that bugged me was that I couldn't kiss Since, she wasn't down because sitting behind us was a group of people she know and would have felt weird kissing in front of. Affection, I realize how much I like and desire it while Ithaca was in Colorado.
Anyways, after the concert me Since and her mom went to eat in a dinner which led to interesting conversation in which I you know, made sure I didn't talk about stealing, anarchy and digging through trash so I wouldn't alienate everyone but myself (talking about bikes is okay though). Biked home after food and slept after some internet.
Saturday: Wake up, waste time online, go the work on garden; change list online, water plants, make fliers build a composter out of pallets. Returned home and gathered all the zines I posses (not that many) and bike into Williamsburg for a mini zine fest (even saw some anarchist graffiti on the way, which I of course surrounded with my own anarchist stickers). When I first go to the place I was kinda disheartened by how small it was but quickly started interesting conversations with the zinesters, talked about superheros, art, finding stuff, bad boyfriends alla that. I picked up a(n anarcha-)feminist zine and sat down to read it when the girl behind the table yelled to me that it wasn't free, I reassured her that I just wanted to check it out and that I would return it to her. After skimming for a few minutes I brought her the zine and told her I wouldn't rob her because that's fucked up, she let me keep the zine I was touched, a free zine? for me? aww shucks. I checked out the other tables and not much politics going on, mostly artsy things and personal artsy things. I went back to the feminist zine table and traded a copy of "Fighting for our Lives" for the second and third issues of the zine I got for free (it's called Hoax if you're interested). I left the zine fest shortly afterward.
At home I showed my mom the zines, and we ate Mexican food across the street. During the meal I realized I was late to meet up with Bigs and a few other friends, I finished my meal quickly and biked there fast...
Turns out I was the first on there. I waited around and read Hoax. When everyone convened we walked into the park and sat within hearing range of the music and just chilled on a blanket. Afterward it was food time (oh noes, only $10 and I had planned on using that to get in a party later tonight), we were gonna eat at a Chinese restaurant. Luckily for me one of our friends had to go to a neighbors' of hers and watch a dog, we all agreed to order our stuff take out and eat there. At that point I decided fuck it, I'm still not gonna pay for food, on the way to the neighbors we stopped at a supermarket, I bought a plum and left handed a microwave Indian diner.
Speaking of awesome free stuff, on the way to meet our friend's we found spray paint and acrylic paint in someones trash, gonna have to start writing things on walls soon. Ate and hung out at the neighbors house a bit and then Bigs and I left to go to a party. We had a hard time finding it and were lucky when a person from the neighborhood told us the correct address. We climbed up too roofs before finding the "rooftop party" in the basement of a building, but it's okay, because even though it took forever to find, and kinda really sucked once we got inside, we didn't pay cover since we entered through the back :)
Today is gonna be Food not Bombs and Grub community dinner, woop woop.

Biking to work, hanging with Ithaca and meeting anarchists

This week has had it's ups and downs since Saturday. Ithaca was here, she left this morning and I won't see her until the end of August, (we're going camping and then she's dropping me off in MTL while she brings her stuff home). Her being here was really cool, but I felt strange and was sad a lot because I felt that I liked her a lot more than she liked me (which of course wasn't the case), which happens I guess when you're thinking to much and not talking enough. Communication it's still a ridiculously important thing, for serious, if you interact with people learn to communicate well! What did we do? Food not Bombs, really really free market,bike around, hang out at bluestockings, read zines at ABC no Rio, read zines at home, yea I know, but believe me when I tell you that Ithaca isn't anarcho-punk, I guess she's just down like that.
I'm working now, :( I have a job. I work at the French Consulate. I make calls and look at papers and doing nothing interesting (except slack to read Evasion every now and then). I bike to work ('cept today because of rain and heat) which is the best part, I cover like 100 blocks in anywhere between 30 and 45 minutes including the Manhattan Bridge, so that's usually the funnest part about my work. I've decided that I'm only gonna buy vegetarian food, no money towards meat as of before yesterday I think or maybe it was Friday I decided either way though I'm not ready to only buy vegan, what about cheese you know?
Right now I'm waiting for food to arrive (yea I know, but hear me out, it's to early to dumpster, nothing to cook in the fridge and I'm not gonna start shoplifting hardcore from the supermarket across the street from my parents house, that's bad form), then I'll probably head to anarchist black cross to send out books and probably run into this guy I met there last time that also does food not bombs, he seems pretty chill and seems like the kinda guy I can count on to get into trouble doing anarchist stuff (read: wheatpaste). Also the Squat garden is progressing nicely.

I got some books and stuff worked out

Crimethinc books came in the mail today, I got Off the Map, Evasion, Recipes for Disaster and some copies of Fighting for our Lives along with all the stickers, posters and other goodies that Crimethinc sends away with all their packages.
I couldn't really enjoy it though because I felt like complete and utter shit. Had talked to Ithaca online the night before and the conversation ended abruptly and badly. I felt terrible all morning and for the first time in I don't know how long I curled up and did nothing but cry. I sent way more emails than I received. In the end I went out and did stuff (only because I had to). Took my sister to the hair dresser, watered the squat garden and went to buy formal clothes with my mother for a job I might get.
Got back home and checked my mail. Ithaca had sent me a number where I could contact her and we talked, she knows how I feel, I know how she feels, things are back to normal. Not feeling like shit is pretty great I must say.

Local, organic, mutual aid and travel

Went down to the garden about an hour ago to water the plants, a neighbor and her daughter saw us walking with the watering cans and came along to see how the garden was. She was telling us about getting grants and possibly buying the lot from the city or owner for $1 since it's been abandoned for years. After we finish watering it we're standing around talking and some guy rolls buy on a skate board and asks who's lot it is, it's a squat. He tells us he's down to help out and has a truck and experience and some people who would be down to help out which is cool. I passed him my number and later he called and we decided to set something up for later in the week. It's cool to just get help like that, visibility helps a lot I guess.
Also talked to Cipher a bit and we're gonna travel around a bit in August, set aside the 1st until the 20th. We want to do the Anarchy Summer Camp (http://selfdescribed.org/?p=447) and then do the Western Maryland Zine Fest (http://news.infoshop.org/article.php?story=20100607002621901) then come home. We'll probably hitch there and back. It's be cool to find some people heading there or back to NY though to make things easier but if it doesn't happen than whatever.

Dirt and glass

Hung out at home all morning, tried giving Virgil a call but he was asleep, never called back, whatever. Since told me last night to expect a call from her so we could meet up and hang out at the MoMA, but you know it's Since and all our plans seem to fall through...
Only one thing to do, go the squat garden with my sister. We moved out more debris, turned most of the earth and-
Wait, phone call from Since, basically: come to the MoMA, there's a documentary. Oooh okay, sounds like a plan.
Head home, remove sneakers, put tools away, wipe away some dirt, prepare to leave while explaining plan to my mother and she's sayin-
Wait phone call from Since, basically: the movie is full, umm iunno, yea ok I'll call you when it's over (I guess she's still in the movie...)
Return to the squat garden with plants and sister and water and mom and tools. Finish turning the earth. Make a pathway from discarded bricks and rocks, cut finger on glass, dig holes and plant things, add water, take picture, go home, half expect Since to give a call, eat dinner, stay upstairs and read a bit (the phone has reception there and you know Since might call :-/ ), lose patience and go down stairs, hope Ithaca is online, have to tell her about possible change in plans for the day she gets back, check random websites, get inspired to travel, send a message to Cipher about potential travel, read a bit more, write blog...
Here's a pic of the squat garden so far: except the uploader put it at the top so yea...
Haven't been feeling as upbeat and awesome as of late, can't pinpoint why, *shrug*
Oh also, talked to Pagoda online about squatting got some tips which was cool :)

Cancelled plans and free movies

Today's plan was as follows:
See Since
watch a movie together
cuddle
feel less shitty
Today actually happened as follows:
Call Since about once an hour until approximately 7, at which point I had decided that I'd leave to the Anarchist Black Cross and possibly meet up with Wedge at a party. So roll out on a bike to Anarchist Black Cross (ABC)and hang out there, spent most of the time there learning the basics of their set up and wrapping dictionaries in brown paper to send to prisoners. A guy showed up and told me that the ABC no Rio Food not Bombs was up and running which is good news to me (I'll go next next Sunday, this Sunday is Manhunt, hopefully Crisis will show up). When ABC ended I gave Wedge a call and asked about the party, he said it was dying and that they'd probably go see a movie (shit yo! movies cost money) I told him I'd show up, but that I was broke as fuck.
At the party we just talked and hung I recognized and conversed with a few familiar faces. Then we all got kicked out (time is up) and headed to some bar, hung out there for a while just kicking it (I still don't drink, straight edge since forever yo). After the bar people started heading toward the movie, I wanted to bounce at this point but was told we would see it FO FREE! so I stuck around. On the way to the theatre Since gave a call and apologized for standing me up which I told her was okay because I didn't sit around at home doing nothing anyway. Also on the way there I ran into some friends and one of them told me a cool place to get messenger work so I'll check that out. Got to the theatre, put our bikes inside because we're fancy like that (you know how we do on some VIP shit up in here, lol 'cept not) and walked into the room to watch Inception for free. It was an awesome movie, see it (I'm encouraging you to see it, not necessarily to pay for it). It's kinda a mind fuck throughout especially the ending, watch out.
Afterward just rode home while I was on the phone with my mom, riding mostly with no hands. Made me realize how fast I am, made it home in like ten minutes going slow with no hands, imagine how fast I would've been tearing it up with handle bar usage and no phone pressed to my ear!
Home now, gonna read some "Tales of a Punk Rock Nothing" which just came in the mail today or yesterday, I don't remember and then hit the sack. Also supposed to meet up with Since tomorrow and go to a museum, in the morning I'll probably work on the garden with Virgil if he's down. I'll see...

feeling shitty

At first I wasn't going to write this and I felt like writing this in a notebook and starting a journal (reading "Tales of a Punk Rock Nothing" make me wanna start a journal), but I decided fuck it, I mean no one reads this and the people who do I trust (yea I trust you, be flattered). Why do I feel shitty?
I think it's a combination of the following (in no particular order):
Feeling distant from Ithaca
Not being able to see Since because of shitty logistics
Not having the same crew of friends as in Montreal (I need to make some literally rad friends)
Having spent a night in jail and consequently not feeling the shoplifting thing as much and of course the general shittyness of that whole situation in general
Knowing that Ithaca is probably gonna start seeing someone (this I feel is stupid, I mean I gotta walk the walk if I talk the talk, I'm surprised this is even part the shit that's getting to me, I guess it's because the feeling distant is also here that it's getting to me)
Feeling lonely despite efforts to be social
I kinda just want someone to give me a huge hug and kiss and really mean it. I tried to cry but I can't, maybe gender socialization is deeply ingrained in me, maybe I'm just not sad enough to cry, I don't remember the last time I cried, is that healthy?
Hopefully I'll see Since later today and tell her about the shitty night in jail and cuddle in front of a movie and maybe do other things. If I can't contact her at 7 I'm gonna go to the Anarchist Black Cross to hang out there; meet people, make new friends, find people who might be down to garden in the squat garden. I gotta call Virgil and ask if he wants to work on it tomorrow. I should probably look at the bike messenger dude that Cipher's dad told me about.
I'm thinking I'll be less sad if I have work, but at the same time that's pretty shitty, it won't mean stuff is less shitty it just means I won't notice it as much, which is, you know, a great way to make the world a better place, just kinda stop seeing all the problems...
Maybe I got too used to Ithaca being around and making me feel good. In Montreal when I was seeing Pagoda and Ice Cream and Ithaca, I never dealt with stuff like this, I guess it just didn't come up. Iunno, I've always felt that poly was good for me because it kept me balanced, never too worried about any one relationship because I knew that at the end of the day there was always someone I could hold/who could hold me. Not that I don't want to be in any kind of invested relationship, that's not it, I really like what is going on with Ithaca and I, it's been since April that we've been seeing each other which is longer than I've ever been with anyone before and it's nice. There are ups and downs but they seem worth it. I feel as though I'm ranting, but not even sure what about...
I wanna squat a building, open a community center, never pay rent, do food not bombs, and generally spread what I consider to be anarchist alternatives to the shitty capitalist bull that's happening now. I mean it could totally be worse. I guess I'm just discouraged a bit from doing anything illegal because of the arrest, and the finger prints and the photos and the getting busted shoplifting it all took place to close to each other. I shoulda stole the map of Manhattan, I would of totally gotten away with it and it would've kept my theft-confidence up...
I'll see what's up with what...
writing this felt good, if you read this you're awesome I guess...

Shitty night and today

Before yesterday I went to see a concert in Central park with Wedge and another friend, but it sucked to we left. We were walking to Time Square to meet a friend. As we walked along 42nd street and long story short I got arrested for carrying a "gravity knife", which is apparently illegal. I spent the night in three cells. At around 7.30 PM yesterday I got out and I have to show up to court the 20th of September (that's great you know because it's not like I'm gonna be going to school in Montreal or anything...) Staying in jail is shitty. I went and hung out with Bigs and Wedge and some other friends the night I got out but I was super tired so I couldn't really enjoy it. Today I'm supposed to see Since and watch a movie which could be good times.
Talked to Ithaca and she's having a good time in Colorado. She might start seeing a guy there which is cool with me but is starting to feel shitty, I'll have to deal and I'll learn from it as well.
Wanna work on the squat garden more soon...

The Beginnings of a Squat Garden

Today I started the squat garden I wanted to start. I tried calling a few people to come help out but only Virgil showed up which is fine with me. We grabbed some gloves and gardening things that I found in my laundry room and went to the spot. It was full of trash, much more than I had realized, we started filling up a trash bag...
We used the old bricks to "fence" off an area that would be the garden and also a small area to the side to be a compost pile. We pulled weeds and removed the roots before composting them, moved rocks and wood, we tried to level the garden floor a bit, we'll need to use the stones and sticks for that, with some earth from the part of the lot we haven't started yet. After it started to get dark we went home, made a squatter flag, went back, tied it to an adjacent fence and then left for good. I'm excited to keep working on the garden in the future.